I came across this tweet the other day. It reads:

The real reason you’re tired all the time: It’s not your workload. It’s your open loops. The text you haven’t answered. The apology you owe. The decision you’re avoiding. The conversation you keep postponing. These run in the background of your mind all day, draining your battery. Close your loops. Watch your energy return. Mental clutter is more exhausting than physical work ever will be. – Scott D. Clary

I don’t follow Scott D. Clary, or two people that quoted tweeted it. This was a random post on my X feed — the kind I usually ignore — but something about it caught my eye today. It’s hardly novel, but I like the language and the imagery of the word “loop” and how it’s used here.

And I have many open loops in my life. Far too many. I have dozens of half-complete projects, ideas, chores, experiments. Many of them are well underway — but until they’re complete, I can’t yet cross them off my todo list, and until I do, I carry their load.

As I write this, there are 8 picture frames on our kitchen table. Each contains a magazine cover that Anne picked and framed and plans to display in a 2x4 grid in the living room. She framed them over two months ago, but they’re not on the wall yet. This is an “open loop” and the cost of keeping it open is not zero. You pay with your attention, a little bit every day. It’s like interest. You don’t feel it, but it eventually adds up.

This is just one example. I have a blog post about my Bighorn 100 miler run in 2023 that I wrote 99% of but never published. It just needs a proof read, but the draft sits on my hard drive collecting digital dust. The work is done but the loop is still open.

Last October, I started the process of importing my Sprinter van from British Columbia into Quebec. I had it inspected, was told it needed a wheel alignment—it didn’t—got it aligned anyway only to discover the paperwork wasn’t correct, so it had to be aligned again. Then it stopped running. Now it sits in the driveway, unplated, uninsured, and in need of a new fuel filter and several small fixes to pass inspection.

Our storage room in the basement is overflowing. We should be getting rid of things, but instead we keep accumulating things, stuffing them in the basement. Every time I go in there to grab a tool or some paper towels, I step over boxes and bins, things to sell, broken appliances I need to fix. It’s a whole room of open loops.

In my defence, I have a one-year-old and the past year has been devoted to him. I simply haven’t had time to take care of some of these things. But the reason these loops stay open isn’t the important part. The point is that when they’re open, whatever the reason, you suffer. It’s like the credit card you only pay the minimum payment on each month. Until you pay it off in full, you’re a slave to that debt.

My wife is good at closing loops. As soon as something is put on her plate, if she can take care of it immediately, she does. She doesn’t use a to-do list manager, she just gets things done. I envy this ability of hers and I’m trying to learn to do this for parts of my life. “Done is better than perfect.”

At least I’m aware of my open loops. I know they are draining me. They’ve reached a critical mass and I’ve started paying off the debt. Last week I finally reorganized my external hard drives and it felt great. I just have to build on that moment, start checking things off and celebrating the wins along the way.

Ross Noble is a software developer, ultrarunner, podcaster and former van-dweller with a passion for the outdoors. He writes about running, cinema and anything else that interest him.

Montreal, QC